TL;DR -- My update schedule told me to blog. I have pink hair. Graduated college again. Anxiety is awful. Random oversharing. I'm making questionable choices. Our house is infested by ants. My Husband and I have different emotional needs, and that's okay. My blog schedule says I'm supposed to update about my life today. Though … Continue reading “That isn’t funny at all, but it almost sounds like it should be?”
Panic traces the shell of my ear, whispers with its fingertips. It promises. Compulsion holds, caresses with the hands of a shallow lover. I still between.
I just... I wrote a post, a post with actual blog-specific topical content. I do run a life AND ANIME blog, after all. I thought it was good, too. Then WordPress lost my draft, and I lost all motivation to rewrite what I had almost entirely finished. It’s 11 PM—not that late—but I’m tired. I … Continue reading Having OCD during a pandemic is really fun
To preface this in case I have new readers, I’ve struggled with anxiety and OCD all of my life. I’m also a Christian, and there is this stigma about mental health in some Christian circles that I feel can be pretty powerful. Last night, par the course for my demons, I was /convinced/ that I … Continue reading “It’s about carrying on when all you want to do is quit.”
So. Things are happening. Let me keep you updated. I know I haven't said much about my health since I herniated my back, except that things have been difficult. Vague allusions are vague. But I plan to clear just a bit of that up today. Just a bit. But before that, news. Firstly, I tried … Continue reading CBD and Therapy(ies) for Me
(If you came for my usual anime ramblings, this is not the post for you, dear readers. It's also probably not well written because catharsis and I mean, transitions? What are those?) My husband bought me produce. (You probably thought I was hopping on to talk about anime, enthuse over some new otome, or heck, … Continue reading Bugs are not burrowing into my brain, but it feels like it because of vegetables. (also, heath update)
I'm sharing because I really want to help. This is going to get painful, and I may regret it if my identity is ever discovered (please no) but I suppose you've been warned. And Husband says that no one cares to try and find me, so I'm trying to put that fear aside I favor … Continue reading Adding new letters to my labels. (Accepting a diagnosis of OCD)
Warning: I don't even know what this is. Is it even coherent? Maybe not. I will admit that I am not currently my best self. It is with much self-depreciation (and as vaguely emo music plays through my headphones) that I morosely admit as much, but I feel that makes the statement no less true. I'm … Continue reading May is Hard. (This was supposed to be a blog update, but now I don’t know what it is?)
I didn't know any of you once, and while I'm glad for the relationships gained, things were easier then in the over-sharing department. I used to be shouting into the vast expanse of the internet without consequence. Now some of you have names and faces, and that's scary to me, because judgement can therefore exist, … Continue reading I’ll probably delete this, but you are not alone. — an anxious “letter”
I'd like to say it rattles, but it's far too firm a grip for that; I'd like to say it pushes me to action, but all too often I find myself isolated and afraid. There's this monster inside of me, you see, and it can strike at any moment; it makes mountains out of mole … Continue reading It scrapes and breathes.